This last weekend, I read the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy. For free, mind you, courtesy of the interwebz. I might be curious about mommy porn, but I'm not spending money on it.
After starting book two, I decided I really really wanted to rewrite the books, using words and mixing up the metaphors and descriptors*.
Because it reads like Twihard fanfic. Badly-written twihard fan-fic.
Which it is.
I made a comment about it on Facebook, and was thusly informed by Miss Proffitt (of GoodGirlsGoneGeek).
It needs a good trip through a writer's workshop. Maybe an extended holiday.
But the thing that really cheeses me off about the whole affair is that Vintage is the publishing house that won the rights to the books and published them. VINTAGE USED TO HAVE INTEGRITY.
*How many times can someone be wrapped around you like a vine, or elongate your nipples, or use the phrase "apex of my thighs." And when you have hot mind-blowingly amazing sex, please don't think, "HOLY COW." all the time. But, "Laters, baby." amuses me.
Don't even get me started on the whole inner goddess idiocy.
After starting book two, I decided I really really wanted to rewrite the books, using words and mixing up the metaphors and descriptors*.
Because it reads like Twihard fanfic. Badly-written twihard fan-fic.
Which it is.
I made a comment about it on Facebook, and was thusly informed by Miss Proffitt (of GoodGirlsGoneGeek).
It needs a good trip through a writer's workshop. Maybe an extended holiday.
But the thing that really cheeses me off about the whole affair is that Vintage is the publishing house that won the rights to the books and published them. VINTAGE USED TO HAVE INTEGRITY.
*How many times can someone be wrapped around you like a vine, or elongate your nipples, or use the phrase "apex of my thighs." And when you have hot mind-blowingly amazing sex, please don't think, "HOLY COW." all the time. But, "Laters, baby." amuses me.
Don't even get me started on the whole inner goddess idiocy.
